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gigglebug278 50, Male, Kansas, USA - 3 entries

Oct 2008
5:14 AM EDT

who is this

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timeflys 69, Female, United Kingdom - 37 entries

Oct 2008
5:16 PM EDT

so glad i became and adventerer and came

going to the riley mansion this weekend cant wait.since ive been here ive had so much love and happiness and joy i never knkew i could be this happy or feel like this ive made newfriends.found people that are a joy to be around played bingo,seen brillent churches,musuems,gallerys,pubs,canel walks,great shopping,and it has all had a very positive effect on my life.the gardens parks flowers trees plants things ive never seen before it is absoultly brillent. i love the sheep in the fields the horses cattle hills ive never seen a place so close to heaven or so bueatiful in all my life and im really happy

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shevieisinlove 33, Female, Philippines - 17 entries

Oct 2008
11:34 PM EDT

im all out of love.. i need someone to lean on.. i need someone.. :'(

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rayangel07 33, Female, Kentucky, USA - First entry!

Oct 2008
8:21 AM EDT

Angel Loves Michael

Today is going okay so far...Im setting in my economics class bored to death missing my man. I still have about 34 minutes to kill until class change, and I really wish this day would hurry and end, altho, it sucks because its friday and I wont get to see him for the next two days...I dont usually write journals on here, I have had this for a while but never done anything with it. lol I dont think many poeple will be reading anything on here anyways. but its something to do, I have parents who dont know how to make there own journals to read, so they read mine, so I guess internet journals are really a last resort. Something to do though.Im E-mailing my cuz, and was writing the boyfriend, but time is still going by just as slow. I just cant wait till this class ends. I am really have withdraws from the boyfriend and miss him bad..

�I never thought� I would feel this way about someone like this. This guy has me thinking about him constatly thinking about him, I know he actually likes me back, hes my best friend, and hes my life. I know that he feels the same, and knowing that keeps me smiling thorughout the day. I have never been happyer then I am now. I want to be with this boy forever. I know girls in highschool say that all the time, and when it comes down to it, they can get over the guy in a week- This is diffrent...I have had puppy love before, But this is full blown love. Its diffrent in ever way. I can see myself with him in the futur, and he says the same. I think its going to work out that way. Hes going to be my highschool sweetheart and Im going to be his. Im glad Ive found the person I think that I want to be with at a young age. 16 year olds usually are spaced between who they like, but I know, and I want to keep this one forever. I love him so much and hes the first person that I know actually loves me back. At lest I wont be older and scared that I will never find love, cause I have found it now. I want him more then anything. I would give up everything just to make him smile. His happyness is the reason for my joy

Angel 'Williams'�Loves Michael Williams Forever

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lyubomirb 36, Male, Florida, USA - 44 entries

Oct 2008
6:59 PM EST

not happy

�� I have been avoiding the internet a lot lately. I needed someone to talk to and all I have is writing journals and expect a random person in the world to read it.

�� I turned 19 over a month ago and I don’t feel any different. I forget that I am not 18 anymore. I guess maybe that is because I didn’t have any celebration. I remember waking up in the morning for a drink. I remember hiding in my room, avoiding phone calls and doorbells. Both of my parents were at work and my sisters at work or school. I was trying to keep myself from going nuts. It was probably the worst day of the year. I didn’t feel like talking to anyone. I spent drinking till midnight hoping to get noticed.

�� I think most of my problems come from my childhood. I remember hiding under the kitchen table when my father came from work. I seriously thought he was a stranger. I remember looking out the window watching kids play while my mother kept me locked up at home. I cry when I realize I never had a chance to be a kid. I was always an adult who had to think for myself and for others. I wish to know what it feels like being cared for.

�� I didn’t have the love that parents could give to their children. I never wanted to hug or kiss my parents. I remember once I kissed my mom when she brought food home, but I was on drugs and got very hungry. I wanted to see a physiatrist just to have someone I could talk to. That part I was always missing in my life.

�� All my parents care for is money. Every day I come home I have so much tension on me. I hear them tell me all the things I should have done today, and at the end of conversation I am the bad guy. I separate myself from family a lot. I tell them I have plans with my friends, but instead I go anywhere to be alone. I can walk in to a bar for a drink and sit alone in the corner. I don’t talk unless I say give me a check. I sit on a bench outside smoking a cigarette.�I got for a walk or look at the stars at night. I always think if maybe someone is looking at them with me.

�� I am not really the guy people like to be around with. I feel as if I am cursed. I don’t make anyone feel better so I try not to communicate much. I want to escape from everything. Not exactly looking towards a new life I want to be gone. I don’t want to be where I am. I don’t like being alone all the time, but its best this way. I can’t be making more mistakes. I give people a favor when I leave.

�� I know I need help but no one to ask from. I know I need to talk about things that are bothering me but no one around I can trust. I am not a very good person. I do things that make me a queer. I don’t have anyone I can relate to.�Everyone always leaves me. I feel like the only reason I am still alive is because I can poison my mind long enough for tomorrow. And then everything starts over again.

�� I hate my life. I have so many opportunities but I don’t have the strength to take my chances. I was looking for a job and applied at few places. It has been over a month and no calls. I gave up looking. I can survive without a job anyways. I am not ready to go to work. If only I could pull myself together, but I only drip blood.

�� This is my life. These are my miseries. It will always be this way. I am the guy who walks into a bar for a drink. Always comes alone, it is almost pointless. When I die I don’t need to be remembered like this. I will be forgotten very fast as I am forgotten alive.

Tags: not happy

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1 comment(s) - 05:45 PM - 05/07/2010

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Kitten 70, Female, California, USA - 88 entries

Oct 2008
12:13 AM PDT

Silence is Power

Today's quote is: "Answer your critics with silence and indifference. It works better, I assure you, than anger and argument".

Interesting indeed. I've thought this and used it at every opportunity. In recent times I'm practicing still.

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meagan 47, Female, Canada - 15 entries

Oct 2008
11:14 AM EST

Motherhood is CRAZY!!!

OK, so I had my beautiful baby boy, Zakariah on August 30!� I knew being a new mom would be very challenging, but I wasn't prepared for this!!!� The past almost two months have been insane to say the least!� But, I'm actually started to feel a bit more comfortable with it all now!� I'm back to teaching a few dance classes a week at my studio, and I've tried to resume my�daily workouts (whenever Zak will let me!)� Sometimes I get my cardio by jumping around the living room to Pussycat Dolls while making faces at my baby to keep him happy, or�if he falls asleep I can take him down in his stroller to the gym in our condo.� I gained a whopping total of 60 pounds during this pregnancy - too many cupcakes and ice cream for sure!� But, how I'm looking at it now is -�it will just make for a more�dramatic body makeover!� I took a before picture in a bikini last week - eek!�(at which point I was 40 pounds over my normal weight), so over the next few months I hope to make huge progress with my body transformation back into it's fit self (and hopefully even better than before my pregnancy�- as I plan to compete in a fitness competition in the late spring or early summer!)� I'll keep you all posted on my journey!

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